Saturday, September 26, 2009

Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall

This week has been full of rain, in both a figurative and literal way. When my Dad had his cancer surgery (mentioned in the post below)on July 24, my family members and I all thought that getting the cancer out was the biggest of our worries. However, Dad's road to recovery has been long and hard and has included many complications from the harmless but irritating case of the hiccups which lasted four days after his surgery, to serious life threatening complications such as kidney failure, blood clots, bleeding, and aneurysms. The last two of these occurred at the beginning of this week. The stress of the worry, of seeing my dad's apartment looking like a crime scene, trips to the hospital, sitting in the surgical waiting rooms, as well as attending my husband's grandmother's funeral, and just trying to accomplish the tasks of regular life have left me feeling physically and emotionally drained.

It has also been raining--that wet sort of rain which comes from clouds--this week as well. Ironically, this rain has been healing. When I walked out of the school building where I teach on Thursday, I was much too tired to run to my car as I would on any other rainy day. I walked slowly. And when I felt the light rain on my head, I turned my face upward and stretched out my arms to offer more of my skin up to it's healing touch. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply the smell of the wet earth.

When I got to my car, a fond recollection came to my mind. It was a long forgotten memory about my grandpa. I was about five years old, and my brother and I were visiting my grandparents when they lived in Florida. Eddie, Grandpa and I were looking out the window as the rain filled up the street. We saw a jogger.
Grandpa grumbled(his speech always sounded like a grumble)"Joggin' in the rain, joggin' in the rain, see that crazy man, joggin' in the rain?" Eddie and I nodded. Then grandpa gave us a strange look. "Do you want to go joggin' in the rain?" he asked us. We said we did, and grandma dressed us in our bathing suits and sneakers and grandpa put a sleevess undershirt and a pair of shorts (I'm sure it was the only time I had ever seen him wear shorts!) and we went joggin' in the rain! I'm sure I had not thought of that since the day it happened 35 years ago, but the memory was healing too since mostly I remember my father's father as mean and angry.

I went to the hospital again to see my dad that evening, and when I returned home it was still raining, so I asked my husband to join me for a walk in the rain. He was surprised, but said afterward that it was quite pleasant.

Then Friday night, although I have felt exhausted all week, I was having trouble sleeping. It was still raining and I convinced my husband that we should spread sleeping bags out on the floor of our screen porch and "camp out" there for the night. The rhythm of the rain on the roof, the patter of it on the tree leaves and the smell of it in the air was like calming music, and medicine for my soul. And, while a few hours later we opted for our soft bed in leu of the porch's concrete floor, I was relaxed enough to sleep restfully until morning after that.

Rain can mean storms, floods and disasters, but it is also healing, renewing, cleansing, life-giving--thank God for the rain.

8 comments:

Lori Metcalf Dolls said...

I'm sorry to hear all the stressful things you are going through. But I love the lovely memories you found. With you positive attitude and loving support of your family I'm sure you will get through this. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Draffin Bears said...

Hi Tami,

So very sorry to hear about the rough time, you are having in your life.
Sending lots of hugs, support and good wishes for your Family.

Hugs
Carolyn

Cheryl said...

Tami, I'm glad you have found little moments of healing during this tough time. Know that I am thinking of you and holding you and your family in my heart.
Warmly,
Cheryl

Tammy said...

Tami, my heart goes out to you and your family at this hard time. It is never easy to watch a loved one suffer. What a blessing that you have found the rain to comfort you, and bring back that wonderful memory of your Grampa. God does know how to sustain and comfort us in our times of trouble.

I love Mercy Me and that song. You may also enjoy , When The Rain Comes by Third Day.

Senging Prayers for you all .
Hugs, Tammy

Shelli said...

You beautiful, poetic soul. I'm so sorry to hear about the hard time you're having, hon. I'm with you in spirit and friendship; please hang in there, and of course all my most healing wishes to your dad.

Please take good care.

Shel

Tami Eveslage said...

Thank you so much, Like the rain, your showers of compassion bring me great comfort. Thank you, Firends.

Bumpkin Bears said...

My thoughts and hugs are with you whenever you need them. Big HUGS, Catherine x

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